Friday, 23 November 2012

Thankful Thoughts, et Addendum


It occurred to me that yesterday was Thanksgiving for my American readers across the Atlantic and, in that spirit, I thought I'd share some of what I'm thankful for. 

Before this post can launch off into the aether and into your brains, lemme just post a little disclaimer here: I haven't slept in 24 hours, still high on the medication I took yesterday, have aches in that part of my body called 'everywhere' and am chugging scalding hot coffee in hopes that the magical elixir of the Aztecs will cure the headache I've been having for 3 days straight. 

And on that happy note, let's get started.

First, I'm thankful for the two brain cells which rubbed together and formed the thought which spurred me to resume writing again. That's the story behind Firstborn really.

I'm thankful for all the people who read the book. Even the sample pages. 

I'm even more thankful for those who bought the book. Presumably to read it. Although I know for a fact that they make lovely pillows. If you wanna join this group of people to whom I give all my love, try going
here: http://www.amazon.com/Ryan-Attard/e/B009UW82V8/ref=ntt_athr_dp_pel_pop_1

I'm thankful for all who edited my work and those who helped promote it.

I'm thankful for good music, movies, anime, the whole enchilada. Right now I'm on a Star Wars craze and have plans to do a Lord of the Rings marathon with Shaun this weekend. I also have a Naruto iPhone case with Akastuki red clouds. Yeah, I'm that commercial.

I'm thankful for reviews (Hint, Hint!), which so far have been verbal. Lets write them down people, this isn't the Constitution of England. Which doesn't exist. Cos it's not written down. Ya dig?

I'm even thankful for the one jackass who posted a negative review on my Amazon page. In all fairness, he tried (yes it's a he. I know it, I can Feel it. No woman would be this much of a douche-bag. I recognize my own gender's assholery), to be candid and helpful. He failed. Mostly because the review was based on 2 cocking paragraphs otherwise known as the preview and the entire thing was slanderous. There are maybe 4 words which I have taken into consideration. Again, help me drown this troll with positive reviews. A sentence or two will suffice. Or, hell just click on the stars. A rating is still good.

I'm thankful for rejection letters. There's nothing like 70 robotic 'this project isn't for us' emails to rape, kill and bury whatever self confidence you have. But I amuse myself with imagining how their faces will turn when they line up to watch the movie version. I just hope no one surnamed Stewart or Pattison will be in it.

But seriously, agents. Enough crap now. Yes you showed you have a big swinging dick. Huzzah for you. Now how about you own your eyes and reach inside your hearts and just say 'yes. Yes you poor, dreamer you. We'll give you a chance.' C'mon, have a heart.

That being done with I have some news. I have some free days on KDP select, so if you're that poor, (or that cheap; I know some of you are here for the free stories and laughter) you can nab one then. This only applies to the ebook version of course.

Also: if I reach a 1000 pageviews on this blog, or 100 followers on Twitter OR 1000 sales on amazon (including the freebie days), I will reveal the TITLE OF THE NEXT BOOK. And perhaps some info. Also, look forward to some competitions in which I give out signed copies of Firstborn, maybe a signed poster as well. Oh and maybe an ORIGINAL SHORT STORY which not even my beta readers have seen yet. (Speaking of which, I really gotta hand that to them. Good on Mr. Alzheimer's)

Is your interest peaked yet?

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